WEDNESDAY READER | MARCH 1st
Hello March and welcome!
As the old saying goes, “In like a Lion and out like a Lamb.” We shall see.
The weather here for the past couple of weeks has been up and down like a yo-yo. I don’t prefer one cold day over a warm day because I know in the very near future it’s gonna be one daily temperature – HOT. And for months. Ha
I present to you Wednesday’s Reader.
Know Your Value story will most likely resonate with everyone — somehow. Super spot-on.
Oatmeal Cake with Lazy Daisy Icing is no-fuss, no-nonsense totally chill recipe that is enjoyed by one-and-all. Try it — you’ll like it.
Stephanie Hayes’ column on swimsuits is a terrific piece that absolutely had me cracking up!
Enjoy and have a grand day!
- WHAT PRINCESS FROM GREEK MYTHOLOGY MARRIED THE ONLY MAN WHO COULD DEFEAT HER IN A FOOTRACE?
- TO REACH THE CROWN OF THE STATUE OF LIBERTY FROM THE MAIN LOBBY, HOW MANY STEPS MUST YOU CLIMB?
- THE NEW ENGLAND WHALERS, QUEBEC NORDIQUES, WINNIPEG JETS AND WHICH OTHER TEAM MOVED FROM THE WHA TO THE NHL IN 1979?
a) Calgary Flames
b) Edmonton Oilers
c) Kansas City Scouts
d) New York Islanders
- KNOWN FOR ITS FREE-RANGE BISON HERDS, ANTELOPE ISLAND IS SITUATED IN WHAT AMERICAN LAKE?
a) Lake Champlain
b) The Great Salt Lake
c) Iliamna Lake
d) Lake Ontario
WHAT BLOWS YOUR MIND?
POP QUIZ ANSWERS
- The mythological princess Atalanta married the only man who defeated her in a footrace.
- It’s a climb of 377 steps from the main lobby to the crown of the Statue of Liberty.
- The Edmonton Oilers were a WHA team that joined the NHL in 1979.
- Antelope Island in the Great Salt Lake is home to free-range bison herds.
~ Leslie Elman, Triviabits
COPYRIGHT 2023 LESLIE ELMAN
DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM
KNOW YOUR VALUE
A well known speaker in India started off his public speech in an odd manner – by holding up a Rupee 1000 note (about $20 in our Western Society). Holding the bill high in the air in one of his hands he addressed an eager, curious audience.
“Who among you would like this Rupee 1000 note?”
With great cheers, almost all raised their hands with the shout, “I want it!”
“Oh,” he said, “that’s nice. Well, I am going to give this note to one of you … but first, let me do this.”
Then he crumbled the note in his hands, vigorously, and displayed the awkwardly wrinkled 1000 Rupee holding it up high in his hand.
He then asked, “Who still wants it?”
The same hands went up this time too.
“Well,” he replied, “what if I do this?” and he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe like a mad man.
He picked it up, all crumbled and dirty. It was so smudgy that no one could really recognize it as a 1000 Rupee note.
“Now then, who still wants it?”
Strangely, again, all the hands were up with equal cheers and spirit.
The speaker paused and added with great feeling …
“My Friends,” said he. “You have all learned a very valuable lesson today. No matter what I did to this valuable Rupee note, all of you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It is still worth the same.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled and ground into the dirt of shame and insult by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. In the eyes of God, you are the same ‘most precious jewel of His.'”
~ Heartfelt writer of this piece unknown
Collected from Poeticexpressions.co.uk with permission
IF YOU ASK ME WHAT I CAME INTO THIS LIFE TO DO, I WILL TELL YOU: I CAME TO LIVE OUT LOUD
~ Emile Zola
(( Starve the landfills. Recycle. ))
RIDDLE ME THIS
I AM EASY TO LIFT, BUT HARD TO THROW
What am I?
OATMEAL CAKE WITH LAZY DAISY ICING
The recipe card I am typing this recipe from is written in my grandmother’s handwriting. Such great memories with her in and out of the kitchen. She taught me so much.
Raise your hand if you can identify someone’s handwriting at first glance.
This Oatmeal Cake is one that Grandma made frequently. It’s not fancy. But it is laid back delicious. And super moist. And unbelievably flavorful. And big bonus – a snap to make. It’s good AS breakfast, dessert, or when you’ve got a snack-attack happening. Enjoy!
IN A LARGE BOWL PUT:
1 cup old fashioned oats
1/2 tsp salt
1 stick of butter (that has been sliced into about 8 pieces)
POUR 1 1/3 CUPS OF BOILING WATER OVER ALL AND LET SET A FEW MINUTES.
NOW STIR OATS AND BUTTER MIX AND THEN ADD AND STIR IN TO COMBINE WELL:
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup white sugar
2 eggs, well beaten
1 tsp soda
1 tsp real vanilla extract
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1 1/2 cups flour
PREHEAT OVEN TO 350*
POUR BATTER IN A 13″ x 9″ x 2″ CAKE PAN
And bake for 30 minutes. Don’t over bake. Do the toothpick or knife thing in the middle of cake to make sure it comes out clean and remove from oven. Let it rest on the counter and cool down a little while you make the delish Lazy Daisy topping.
LAZY DAISY ICING
IN A SMALL SAUCE PAN OVER MEDIUM HIGH HEAT COMBINE:
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup canned evaporated milk
1/2 stick of butter (that has been sliced in about 4 pieces)
1 tsp real vanilla extract
3/4 cup shredded, sweetened coconut
BRING TO A BOIL, STIRRING FREQUENTLY, FOR ABOUT A MINUTE OR TWO. THEN SPREAD EVENLY OVER CAKE.
~ Hippie Cowboy recipe box
UNDERBOOB AND FLOSS: WHEREFORE ART THOU SWIMSUITS?
We sat in the lobby of a swank apartment complex deep into an analysis of a radical Polish vegetarian murder mystery. The glam high rise came with a pool deck full of regulation hotties.
Our book club faced the hottie pool during the discussion of lighthearted romp “Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead.” Between bites of cream cheese and red pepper jelly, we glimpsed a breathtaking vision beyond the glass” The philosophically nonexistent bathing suits of 2023.
One member stared out. Without breaking her gaze, she lifted a broken pita chip to the chesty area where a swimsuit top, in theory, would go.
I mean, good for these women in the chip suits, OK? I sit in admiration and awe. No body shaming, no value judgements, go on with your bad self, be free, et cetera. Still, with spring break around the corner, the phenomenon of disappearing swimwear requires analysis in the same manner as ecofeminist lit.
It’s not like miniscule bathing suits are new. Please don’t send photos of 1980s thongs; I’ve seen “Weekend at Bernie’s.” But in an encouraging step for thin-obsessed mankind, swimwear has become more democratized in the 2020’s, marketed and supplied to a wider swath of body shapes. Size inclusivity pays off at the till because, shocker, larger humans also like to swim and look cute.
This beach season’s trendiest looks are a feat of engineering, a spiritual challenge for those who want to keep external organs contained. Sports Illustrated summed up runway activity at the latest Miami Swim Week as a “microstrappy,” and, well, skimpy “thongs, extreme cutouts, micro tops, underboob cutouts, invisible sides.” “Underboob,” a phrase last uttered by a stern lady with measuring tape at Victoria’s Secret, is now an aesthetic goal for … some people.
This includes Kim Kardashian, seen posing from a variety of up-angles in the promos for her intimates and swimwear line. As usual, she outdid everyone by creating a micro thong and top up to a size 4x. They went viral on TikTok for providing coverage the size of … yes, tortilla chips. Actually, the set appears to be underwear used as swimsuits, but considering this void of textile, what the diff?
Teeny bikinis may be part of society’s pandemic pendulum swing; remember the predicted Vibe Shift? Meanwhile, Americans are courting an onslaught of retrograde moral panic stoked by power-hungry politicians. My state of Florida, land of swimwear, leads the way in the crackdown on expression. Florida’s government is the Ikea Smaland manager telling children not to jump in the ball pit. No fun! No variety! The micro bikini, one could argue, is this millennium’s answer to hot pants and miniskirts, a middle finger to didactic manatees.
That said, the pressure. Swimwear trends carry supreme social stress, something women are steeped in every waking second. Make sure your body stays toned, curvy, free of bumps and hair, but don’t be shy to show it off! All butts about it!
Where do chip tops leave the proverbial book club? For example, what if your first two-piece bathing suit had full-coverage, high-waisted shorts and a sports halter as high as Edwardian ruff? What if you are so pale you would catch fire in Skims dental floss? I DON’T KNOW ANYONE LIKE THIS, I AM JUST SPITBALLING.
Or what if, in the words of New York Times writer Jessica Grose, you exist in “the hour between babe and hag.” Meaning, you’re fleetingly neither too young nor old enjoying the years when Don Lemon will take you seriously. In this case, swimwear is a tricky dance, and the style options are not glorious. A character in the FX miniseries “Fleishman is in Trouble” nails the Spandex limbo, trudging past pool moms all wearing the same tired tankini. They have given up ab cutouts and underboob, and thusly, given up on something unsaid.
It’s tempting to get mired in glossy photos, think pieces, TikToks and online shopping, and checking in on reality is vital. So, I popped into Grove Surf & Coffee, a precious store on St. Pete Beach that sells both divine strawberry matcha lattes and trendy swimwear. Many of the bathing suits, adorable indeed, were the size of youth Band-Aids.
Since I was by the beach, I wandered over. Yes, hotties in loincloths existed, but so did teens in bucket hats and rash guards, retirees in ruffled swim skirts, moms in shorts wrangling strollers, unbothered by bohemians wrapped in sea turtle beach towels. People of all shapes, sizes and colors soaked in the sun, dug into the sand and trudged to the car. And no one cared. No one ever cares more than we do inside our own heads.
When it’s my turn to host book club, we’re going to the beach. I’ll bring the chips, but we’re eating them.
~ Stephanie Hayes is a columnist at the Tampa Bay Times in Florida. Follow her at @stephhayes on Twitter or @stephrhayes on Instagram. COPYRIGHT 2023 CREATORS.COM
- You might have heard that March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb … except in Bulgaria, where March comes in like a grumpy old lady. Her name is Baba Marta (Grandma March), and her mood is as unpredictable as March weather on its way to spring. To keep Baba Marta smiling — and the sun shining — people in Bulgaria wear bracelets and trinkets made from red and white yarn, traditionally until they see the first stork of the season or the the first buds on the trees and they’re sure spring has arrived.
- Hunting, habitat destruction and interbreeding with domestic cattle nearly brought bison to extinction in the United States. By 1913, one of the few remaining groups of pure bison was living in a zoo in New York City! Fourteen of them were shipped to Wind Cave National Park in South Dakota to help reestablish herds in the Great Plains.
- The first jockey inducted into the National Hall of Fame was Issac Burns Murphy, who rode 530 winners in 1,538 races, between 1876 and 1895 — for a remarkable 34.46% career victory rate. Murphy won his first Kentucky Derby in 1884 and went to win that race twice more — in 1890 and 1891 — making him the first jockey with consecutive Kentucky Derby victories and the first to win it three times.
- Designated in February 1917, Alaska’s Denali National Park was established largely to boost tourism that would sustain the railroad being built near what was then called Mount McKinley. For naturalists who led the campaign to establish the park, preservation of the area’s natural beauty and its wildlife — especially the Dall sheep — was paramount. They also wanted to retain its Native American name, Denali, meaning “The Great One.”
- Unless someone’s driving around in a Harbaugh or Lomabardi, it seems likely that Knute Rockne is the only football coach to have inspired a namesake automobile. Preparing to introduce a reliable, popular-priced car in 1931, Studebaker realized the Notre Dame football coach was pretty reliable and popular himself. The fact that both the automaker and the university were in South Bend, Indiana, only made the pairing more appropriate. Studebaker even hired Rockne to give motivational workshops to its sales department.
- Two stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame bear the name Harrison Ford. One honors the actor you know from “Star Wars” and “Raiders of the Lost Ark.” The other honors a well-respected stage actor and silent film romantic leading man. Hollywood’s first Harrison Ford appeared in dozens of films between 1915 and 1932 including “Janice Meredith,” a Revolutionary War-themed drama that starred Marion Davies as the woman who instigated Paul Revere’s midnight ride. In that film, Ford played her love interest and W.C. Fields played a drunken British soldier.
~ Leslie’s Triviabits (TM)
COPYRIGHT 2023 LESLIE ELMAN
DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM