WEDNESDAY READER | October 19
Hello Daymaker friends! Happy Wednesday.
The daily and nightly temperatures here are in decline and for sure snuggling in for a nice winter’s nap. Meaning getting chillier.
I remember as a kid in Montana, could just about bet the first snow was Halloween. How do I remember? Inevitably, we had to wear winter coats over our costumes to keep warm as we ran from house to house with crazy joy and glee!
Here’s the newest Wednesday Reader episode. Hope you enjoy. Thanks for being here.
- WHICH DOG BREED TAKES ITS NAME FROM A REGION OF CROATIA?
- SQUIRT AND TING ARE SODAS WITH WHAT FRUIT FLAVOR?
- WHICH COUNTRY’S NATIONAL RUGBY TEAM IS KNOWN AS ‘ALL BLACKS’?
b) New Zealand
d) South Africa
DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN OR LIVED SOMEWHERE YOU THOUGHT WAS HAUNTED?
POP QUIZ ANSWERS
- b) Dalmations
- a) Grapefruit flavored sodas
- b) New Zealand’s national rugby team is called the All Blacks
~ Leslie Elman, Trivia Bits 2018
FAVORITE REAL ESTATE LISTING BLOOPERS
When listing a home for sale, the proper descriptive words are imperative. One small blip can change the entire meaning of the message. The following are examples of actual printed real estate listing bloopers.
- Fresh pain throughout
- Heated poo in backyard
- Custom inferior paint
- Large walking closet
- Ceiling fangs in all bedrooms
- For sale by Ower
- Clean soiled home
- This home is a real germ
- Large walk-in closet & hanging area
- A sinking living room
- Stainless steal appliances
- Remolded bathrooms
- Natural wildlife coroner
- Maturd trees
- Many privates schools in area
- Big wok in closet
- Copper tub is hammered
- Hand oiled broads in living room
- Nice tail behind house
- Home on col-de-sock
- Can wee thru the trees to the lake
- Scream setting
- Beautiful bitch cabinets
AS KIDS WE COULDN’T WAIT TO GROW UP. WOW, WERE WE STUPID.
(( Starve the Landfills. Recycle. ))
RIDDLE ME THIS
WHAT COMES AT THE END OF EVERYTHING?
SPANISH-STYLE SPLIT PEA SOUP
This soup is outstanding. I can’t count how many times I’ve passed the recipe along per request. Serve with a torn chunk of really good, crusty-on-the-outside, soft-on-the-inside artisan bread. I enjoy it with a nice glass of red wine for dinner.
2 cups dried green split peas
2 quarts vegetable stock
1 large onion, sliced
2 large carrots, scrubbed/peeled/sliced
8 cloves garlic, peeled and squished with a knife to break
2 bay leaves
1 box (10 ounces) frozen spinach, thawed
Salt to taste
1/4 cup olive oil
3 large yellow onions, chopped
6 large, fresh tomatoes, chopped
1 TBSP dried basil
2 TBSP fresh parsley
fresh ground black pepper
Freshly grated Parmesan cheese
- Spray a large soup pot with Pam, and in it combine the split peas, stock, sliced onion, carrots, garlic cloves and bay leaves. Bring to a boil, then turn down the heat to low, and simmer, partially covered with a lid (letting steam escape). 1 hour. Add the spinach and and season with at least 1 tsp salt. Continue to simmer another 30 minutes.
Turn off the heat and let cool slightly. Remove the bay leaves. Puree the soup in a food processor or by batches in a blender.
- Meanwhile, in a 10″ skillet heat the oil over medium-heat. Add chopped onions and saute until the onions start to soften – about 3 minutes. Turn down the heat to medium-low heat and continue to saute another 6-8 minutes. Turn down the heat further to very low and cook, stirring often, until the onions are meltingly soft and carmalized, about 10 minutes more. (Watch them carefully so they don’t burn.)
- Add the chopped tomatoes to the onions, increase the heat to medium-low, and cook down until very thick, stirring often, reducing heat as the liquid evaporates. Remove from heat and stir in basil and parsley – and lots of fresh ground pepper.
- Stir the tomato-onion mixture into the pea puree and heat through.
- Serve garnished with freshly grated Parmesan and more fresh parsley. Serves 6-8.
~ Hippie Cowboy recipe box
THE LETTER ‘G’
THE GOON SQUAD
Growing up is scary. There are so many urban legends to learn, so many creatures to fear. The bogeyman. Medusa. Ghosts. Vampires. Brooding vampires.
There seem to be monsters everywhere. Monsters in the closet. Monsters under the bed. “Monsters, Inc.” As if learning about all of these fearsome foes weren’t enough, your peers play into the fright.
For my little brother, the scariest scare of all came when he learned of Bloody Mary, you must turn off the lights, stand in front of a mirror and say her name as you spin three times. On the third time, the spirit will leap out of the mirror and murder you — or at least that is how the urban legend was told to me. And that was how I told it to my little brother when he was a mere kindergartener. To play into the fun (torture?) of spreading the word of the ghost, I made my little brother hold my hand and go through the act of spinning and saying her name. Bloody Mary never jumped out of the mirror. I knew she wouldn’t. I was in 5th grade, after all. But I needed to sell the idea, so every time we turned on the lights, I pointed out a new scar on my body — ones I had earned playing on the jungle gym — and claimed they were wounds at the hands of the ghost. For years after this day in the bathroom, my little brother was terrified of the dark. And mirrors.
Kids are jerks. And having been one of those jerk kids myself, I knew it was only a matter of time until someone told my son of the evil that lurks beneath his bed or in the dark. Every kid has that first monster that makes him question his own safety in the world. For my brother, it was Bloody Mary. For some kids, it is werewolves or witches. For other kids, it’s ghosts and goblins. For my 3-year-old son, it was Little Bunny Foo Foo.
Yes, Little Bunny Foo Foo, that rascally rabbit most known for scooping up field mice and bopping them on the head.
In the story, Little Bunny Foo Foo is turned into a goon after refusing to listen and continuing to knock rodents in the noggin. After being read the bunny book for the first time in preschool class, my son fell into a frenzied crying fit, terrified that he would be turned into a goon. Kids aren’t the only ones who can be jerks. Apparently, feeding into the fear, the teacher told my son that if he didn’t listen to her, he, too, would be goon-ified. Having the track record he does in the listening department, my kid was rightfully terrified.
For the next few nights, he talked incessantly and obsessively about not wanting to be turned into a goon. The mention of Little Bunny Foo Foo had him running for cover. No matter how many times I assured him that no such goon-ification could befall him, my son was certain that a magic wand would be his undoing. So in a moment of desperation, I told him that if his teacher or anyone else were to use a magic wand to turn him into anything other than my sweet boy, I would grab my magic wand and turn him right back.
To which my son said, “You have a magic wand?”
I did not but I have Amazon Prime. Two-day shipping and a wand could be mine.
My son was not thrilled with the idea of waiting. He was tired of not sleeping for the past few nights, as I was I. There would have to be another way to procure the magic wand.
I called a friend who studies all things mystical and magic.
“The wand chooses you,” she said.
“What does that mean?”
“It means find a stick and hot-glue some rhinestones on it.”
My son and I took a walk down a street we’d never ventured on before and found a downed tree. He broke off a branch, covered it in glitter and clutched it as he slept soundly that night.
The world can be a scary place, but now that my son has a wand to combat the goon-makers and Little Bunny Foo Foo, his world is safer.
~ from the archives, 2018 copyright Katiedid Langrock, Creators
- There are only about 300 wolverines living in the “lower 48” United States, none of them in Michigan. Despite the fact that Michigan is nicknamed the Wolverine State — and the University of Michigan mascot is the wolverine — wolverines have never been native to Michigan. These vicious, voracious members of the weasel family prefer colder climates, such as northern Canada and Alaska. Their Michigan connection might have come from 18th century fur traders who sold wolverine pelts there.
- Goliath birdeater tarantulas (Theraphosa blondi) are the largest spiders on earth, weighing a little less than half a pound with leg spans of 11″ and bodies near 5″ long. They sometimes eat birds, but they prefer frogs, toads, lizards and rodents.
Arachnophobes need not fear! You’re unlikely to encounter one of these beauties unless you happen to be trekking in the Amazon rainforest at night (they’re nocturnal). Some people do seek them out, though. Then they roast them and eat them as snacks.
- Four is the only number equal to the number of letters in its English language name. The same is true for vier, the German word for four. The Spanish word for five is Cinco — five letters. And tre, the word for three in Italian, Danish, Swedish and Norwegian, has three letters. Just something to think about.
- The largest volcano on earth is Mauna Loa in Hawaii. At 6.3 miles high and 73 miles across, it’s undeniably huge. But it’s a peewee compared to Olympus Mons, the largest known volcano in the solar system. Situated in the Tharsis Montes volcanicregion of Mars, Olympus Mons is about 16 miles high and 374 miles across, with a volume that’s about 100 times greater than that of Mauna Loa.
- Give the ancient Greeks credit for their wacky sense of humor, especially when it comes to their wildly creative accounts of the deaths of great men. The playwright Aeschylus, for example, was said to have met his end when an eagle dropped a tortoise on his head. Chrysippus, the philosopher, saw a donkey eating figs, gave him wine to wash them down and found it so hilarious that he died laughing.
That’s quite an ironic end for a stoic, who wasn’t prone to showing emotion; if it’s true — which it almost certainly is not.
~ from the archives 2018, Leslie Elman Trivia Bits, Creators