Loaded Avocado Toast

LOADED AVOCADO TOAST, TRACY BECKERMAN’S HUMOR COLUMN ON SPAM EMAIL, TRIVIA, FASCINATING FACTS

Last day of July greetings all!  Hard to believe but ’tis true.

Great read today.

BEGINNING WITH:

LESLIE ELMAN’S POP QUIZ + FASCINATING FACTS
I sure didn’t know, but now I (we) do.

QUICK QUESTION
3 favorite dog names.
I’m thinking most unusual/memorable I’ve come across:
Stanley, who worked with us at Hippie Cowboy, had a pit bull named “Convict.”
One of the Grips we worked with on “Breaking Bad” had a rescue dog named “Chicken”.
A delightful wiggle-tail happy, well-behaved pal of everyone on Set.  And there was nothing chicken about him.
And Peter’s beloved childhood dog went by the name “Shorty.”
I have a pic of Shorty that Peter treasured.  Shorty was adorably not adorably attractive.  HA!
Looking at the pic anyone can spot the sparkle of mischief/character/personality in his eyes + the stories Peter loved to tell.
You?

BILLY’S MISSION STORY
Is a heart stealer – grab a kleenex.
Once you read it — likely — won’t forget it.
Beautiful.

ASSEMBLING LOADED AVOCADO TOAST
Simple. 
Delicious.
Versatile.
It wants to be dressed up in so many different ways.
Get ready to make it on repeat the rest of the summer season.

TRACY BECKERMAN’S COLUMN
Regarding Spam email is totally relatable – at least to me!

STACY’S WORLD
Is back on Friday!  Whooop – Whoop!
I can’t tell, but I will reveal a little bit of a teaser — fashion and footwear.
You absolutely don’t wanna miss it.

AS ALWAYS
We soooo thank you for popping in today + reading + sharing + engaging and being supportive in the Daymaker Readable Art Community.
We high 5 ya and send out air hugs.

Ready?
Set.
Roll.
Enjoy the read!

POP Quiz

POP QUIZ

  1.  “HOW SHARPER THAN A SERPENT’S TOOTH IT IS TO HAVE A THANKLESS CHILD” IS A LINE FROM WHICH PLAY BY WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE?
    a) “Hamlet”
    b) “King Lear”
    c) ” Macbeth”
    d) “Timon of Athens”
  2. HAWAII’S SECOND-BIGGEST ISLAND IS NAMED FOR WHAT DEMIGOD WHO CREATED THE HAWAIIAN ISLANDS AND CAPTURED THE SUN?
    a) Kauai
    b) Lanai
    c) Maui
    d) Molokai
  3. WHICH CONTEMPORARY ARTIST, KNOWN FOR HIS PAINTINGS OF CALIFORNIA SWIMMING POOLS, PAINTED THE INSIDE OF THE POOL AT THE HOLLYWOOD ROOSEVELT HOTEL?
    a) David Hockney
    b) Jasper Johns
    c) Ellsworth Kelly
    d) Cy Twombly

Loaded Avocado Toast

QUICK QUESTION

WHAT ARE 3 OF YOUR
FAVORITE DOG NAMES OF
ALL TIME?

Loaded Avocado Toast

POP QUIZ ANSWERS

  1.   “How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless child” is a line from William Shakespeare’s “King Lear.”
  2.   Hawaii’s second-biggest island, Maui, is named for the demigod who created the Hawaiian Islands and captured the sun.
  3.   Contemporary artist David Hockney painted the inside of the pool at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel.

~ COPYRIGHT LESLIE ELMAN
DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM

BILLY’S MISSION

It was one of the hottest days of the dry season.  We had not seen rain in almost a month.  The crops were dying.  Cows had stopped giving milk.  The creeks and streams were long gone back into the earth.  It was a very dry season that would bankrupt seven farmers before it was through.

Every day, my husband and his brothers would go about the arduous process of trying to get water to the farm.  Lately, this process had involved taking a truck to the river and filling it up with water.  But it was so expensive.  Even the river was getting low.  If we didn’t see some rain soon, we would lose everything.

It was on this day that I learned the true lesson of sharing, and witnessed the only miracle I have seen with my own eyes.

I was in the kitchen making lunch for my husband and his brothers when I saw my six-year-old son, Billy, walking toward the woods.  He wasn’t walking with the usual carefree abandon of a youth, but with serious purpose.

I could only see his back.  He was obviously walking with a great effort, trying to be as still as possible.

Minutes after he had disappeared into the woods, he came running out again, toward the house.  I went back to making sandwiches, thinking that whatever task he had been doing was completed.  Moments later, however, he was once again walking in that slow, purposeful stride toward the woods.  This activity went on for an hour — walk carefully to the woods, run back to the house.

Finally, I couldn’t take it any longer and I crept out of the house and followed him on his journey being very careful not to be seen, as he was obviously doing important work and didn’t need his Mommy checking up on him.

He was cupping both hands in front of him as he walked, being very careful not to spill the water he held in them – maybe 2-3 TBSP were held in his tiny hands.

I sneaked close as he went into the woods.  Branches and thorns slapped his little face but he did not try to avoid them.  He had a higher purpose.

As I leaned in to spy on him, I saw the most amazing sight.  Several large deer loomed in front of him.  Billy walked right up to them.  I almost screamed for him to get away.  A huge buck with elaborate antlers was dangerously close.  But the buck did not threaten him.  He didn’t move as Billy knelt down.

And I saw a tiny fawn laying on the ground, obviously suffering from dehydration, and heat exhaustion, lift its head with great effort to lap up the water cupped in my beautiful boy’s hand.  When the water was gone, Billy jumped up to run back to the house and I hid behind a tree.  I followed him back to the house, to a spigot connected to an empty tank.  Billy opened it all the way up — and a few drops of water began to come out.  He knelt there, letting the drip, drip, slowly fill up his makeshift “cup” as the sun beat down on his little back.

Then it came to me — the trouble he had gotten into for playing with the hose the week before, the lecture he had received about the importance of not wasting water, and the reason he didn’t ask me to help him.  It took a minute for the drops to fill his hands.  When he stood up and began the trek back, I was there in front of him.

His little eyes just filled with tears.

“I’m not wasting,” was all he said.

As he began his walk, I was there in front of him with a small pot of water from the kitchen.  I let him tend to the fawn.  I stayed away.  It was his job.  I stood on the edge of the woods watching the most beautiful heart I have ever known working so hard to save another life.

As the tears that rolled down my face began to hit the ground, they were suddenly joined by other drops … and more drops … and more.

I looked up at the sky.  It was as if God Himself was weeping.

Some will probably say it was just all a huge coincidence — that miracles don’t really exist.  That it was bound to rain sometime and I can’t argue with that and I’m not going to try.

All I can say is that the rain that came that day saved our farm, just like the actions of one little boy who saved another.

~ Author unknown
from my email collection.  This one from 2001

THERE IS NO PERSONAL CHARM
SO GREAT AS A CHEERFUL TEMPERAMENT. 

~ HENRY VAN DYKE ~

INSTANT KARMA

BE SELECTIVE

RIDDLE ME THIS

WHAT DO THE NUMBERS
11, 69 AND 88 ALL HAVE IN COMMON?

Loaded Avocado Toast

LOADED AVOCADO TOAST

Great slices of toasted bread and avocado are best friends.
Especially this time of year.  This put-together is stellar.

HERE’S HOW WE MAKE IT:

TOAST

  • Thick slices of hearty bread – think whole grain – so it’s super toasted and a sturdy platform base

NEXT – MASH ALL TOGETHER

  • In a small bowl, after removing skin and pit of avocado – scoop the flesh out and mash in bowl with a fork until creamy.
  • Add at least least a pinch of salt per avocado half
  • Also add at least a tiny pinch of garlic powder per avocado half

NOW IT’S TIME TO SPREAD THE CREAMY AVOCADO MIX ON TOAST

GARNISH GENEROUSLY WITH WHATEVER YOUR TASTE BUDS DESIRE
A few ideas:

  • Thinly sliced radishes
  • Chopped pickled jalapenoes
  • Thinly sliced summer tomatoes
  • Thinly sliced green onions
  • Toasted sunflower seeds
  • Poached egg

SERVE ON PRETTY SALAD PLATES
With a glass of orange juice or iced tea or iced coffee

TA-DAH!

~ Hippie Cowboy recipe box

RIDDLE ANSWER

THEY ALL READ THE SAME WAY
WHEN PLACED UPSIDE DOWN.

Loaded Avocado Toast

LOST IN SUBURBIA

PARLI ITALIANO?
BY
TRACY BECKERMAN

On a typical day, I will probably get about 30 spam emails.  Most of them are for diet pills, a few for magic cellulite cream (are you noticing a theme here?), and occasionally I get one from a Nigerian prince letting me know he has a million dollars for me if I just give him my bank account number to transfer the funds.  Of course, I never fall for the Nigerian prince scheme, but I have bought cellulite cream more than once.

Then all of a sudden, I started getting a bunch of spam emails that were distinctly different from all the others.

“Hey honey, I’m having a weird thing with my email,” I said to my husband when he got home from work.

“What weird thing?”  he asked.

“I’ve started getting a lot of spam in Italian.”

“Maybe it’s because you like lasagna?”

I shook my head.

“I don’t think that’s it, I said.  “Regardless, I don’t know how to stop it.”

“Just unsubscribe,” he said.

“I don’t know how.  It’s in Italian.”

I tried to think if there was anything I had done that would cause me to get emails in Italian.  No one in my family is Italian, I hadn’t traveled to Italy or signed up for Italian language lessons.  I didn’t even have an Italian pen pal and hadn’t visited Italian websites.  I hadn’t ordered excessive amounts of pasta or sauce online.  I did have something of an addiction with gelato, but that was between me and the ice cream scooper at the gelato place at the place at the mall.

There had been a short time once when I was getting emails in French, but that was because I had ordered something from a French website, and I speak a little bit of French, and maybe also I like french fries and like to get French manicures.  Regardless, I was able to translate them enough to unsubscribe and stop getting them.  But even though I used the Google Translate and was able to decipher some parts of the Italian emails, I still couldn’t figure out how to stop them, or why I was even getting them in the first place.  Interestingly, many of them were for Italian diet pills and magic Italian cellulite cream, that made me realize even the Italian spammers think I might have a weight issue.

While I was pondering all this, I got yet another Italian email, which I translated and learned was from an Italian prince notifying me to say I had won a villa in Italy, and all I had to do was give my bank account number to cover some of the minimal taxes.  I thought about putting him in touch with the Nigerian prince so they could compare notes but decided to delete the email instead.

“I think I know what to do to deal with these Italian emails that I can’t read,” I finally said to my husband.

“Are you going to block them?” he asked.

“No.”

“Are you going to send them to your junk mail filter?”

“No.”

“Then what are you going to do?”

I shrugged.  “I’m going to learn Italian.”

~ Tracy Beckerman is the author of the Amazon Bestseller, “Barking at the Moon:  A Story of Life, Love, and Kibble.”
COPYRIGHT 2024 CREATORS.COM

Fascinating Stuff

  • “All in the Family” yielded the spinoffs “Archie Bunker’s Place,”  “The Jeffersons,” “Maude and a short-lived show called “704 Hauser.”  Spinoffs of spinoffs include “Gloria,” from “Archie Bunker’s Place”; “Checking in,” starring Marla Gibbs in her role as Florence the maid from “The Jeffersons”; and “Good Times,” starring Esther Rolle, who played Florida Evans (also a maid) on “Maude.”  Keeping it all in the family (as it were), Ja’Net DuBois co-starred on “Good Times” and co-wrote and sang “Movin’ on Up,” the theme song of “The Jeffersons.”
  • The Hawaiian song “Aloha ‘Oe” was written by Queen Lilioukalani, last reigning monarch of the kingdom of Hawaii.  The bittersweet song, whose English title is “Farewell to Thee,” was said to be inspired by two lovers parting, but it took on a more poignant meaning when the United States deposed the queen and annexed Hawaii in 1898, ending Hawaii’s history as an independent nation.
  • If you had to conjure up just one mental image of Marilyn Monroe in the movies, chances are you’d think of her in “The Seven Year Itch” wearing that pleated halter dress and standing over the subway grate.  “The Seven Year Itch” starred Tom Ewell as Richard Sherman and Monroe as … What was her character’s name?  Oh, that’s right.  She didn’t have one!  Despite the fact that Monroe received top billing for the role, the character is known merely as “The Girl.”
  • There’s a landmark in Key West, Florida at the southernmost point in the continental United States.  “90 miles to Cuba,” it says.  Cuba’s close to Florida, but Bimini, the westernmost island in the Bahamas, is closer — roughly 50 miles from Miami.
  • At the 1968 talks that led to the Paris Peace Accords to end the Vietnam War, the first order of business was deciding what shape the meeting room table ought to be.  Not surprisingly, the governments of North and South Vietnam had conflicting ideas on the subject.  It took days for all parties to agree on a round table flanked by square tables, where eventually the negotiations began.

~ COPYRIGHT 2024 LESLIE ELMAN
DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM

Day Maker Readable Art
4 replies
  1. Carol says:

    Love the bright, colorful artwork!

    Billy’s Mission did indeed require a hanky. Sweet. Beautiful.

    Can’t get enough Avocado Toast – and this recipe is tomorrow’s breakfast. Mmmmm!

    Thanks, DayMaker. Ready to tackle the day!!!

  2. Marty says:

    Loved the read today from Daymaker.

    My comment on 2024 LESLIE ELMAN as she talked about back in the day funny, family TV shows such as “All in the Family.” I agree it was great.

    Now, I bring forth my favorite: “Everybody Loves Raymond.” I love every personality in that long, long running series. It’s hard to determine which is my favorite personality of the major 6 personalities, however I think I will land on the mother, “Marie”.

    Wow, what a gifted actress. You can YouTube, “Everybody Loves Raymond, Marie” and up comes all of her funny, funny lines.

    If you wish to treat yourself to humor, try that one on! Fact is, I’m going to treat myself tonight.

Comments are closed.